Bitchy

I think I might need to start taking my life in a different direction. Just when I thought things were starting to settle in, they go all ridiculous. Seriously. Is it too much to ask just have all the ducks in a row for even a little bit?

It must be... because...

Things are finally - finally - going extremely well for me in my love life. I've met someone who actually makes me happy. When funny things happen to me, or around me, he's the first person I want to tell. When something shitty happens to me, he's the person I run to to make it go away. Someone asked me if I could picture the rest of my life with him. Well, my jaded ass can't even picture the rest of my day with anyone, let alone the rest of my life. But the difference is, I want to see him every day. And you know me and my normal lack of desire to see a guy ever day. If I can't see him, I at least want to talk to him. That's a really big deal to me. I'm completely comfortable and myself around him, and he's easily one of my best friends. It's great.

So of course, since that is going so well, everything else, inexplicably must fall apart. The Cult, which has been good to me for over a year, has turned on me with a vengeance. In the last week alone, everything I do is called into question, to the extent of both implied and actual discipline. Are you freaking kidding me right now? I can't even breathe without it somehow going against the rules. It all seems to have started when I was seen having a personal conversation with someone much higher up on the food chain than myself. I was simply being a thoughtful human being and asking after this person's spouse and children. Because this person has mentioned the aforementioned spouse and children in prior gatherings, I was just enquiring as to their well-being. Apparently this is a venial sin, because I was told that I was not be bothering such important people. I mean that, literally. "They are busy people, they have planes to catch." Wow. Okay. This has now led to my being picked apart for greater offenses. So, in the past week I've been accused of mortal sin after mortal sin.

Well guess what? If I feel I need to move on, I will move on. I don't want to. I have a history of longevity, my goal is to stick around until I find my own niche there, but if the intent is to close the walls so tightly around me that my only option is to escape, I'll do it.

Anyway, that being said. I'm exhausted. I have a bottle of Moscato that I may delve into, and some cherry vodka that I may mix with Sierra Mist. I'm going to spend the next 45-60 seconds deciding which one will tast better, and enjoy it while watching Ramona & Beezus. If it sucks, I'm going to be even more pissed off.

On second thought, in case it does suck, I'll save it for another day. Instead I will entertain myself with That 70's Show reruns.

Good night.